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  • The Creeps (1997)

    The Creeps (1997)

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    While many of his decisions stumbled, Charles Band would now and then be at the forefront of something big. He founded one of the first home video companies and was the first to film in post-Communist Romania. In the mid-90s, Band saw that Hi-Def was becoming a big thing, so he decided to jump on the opportunity. He announced a slate of 3D movies ready for the Hi-Def revolution but might have overestimated Hi-Def’s potential. One of these movies, Secrets of the Micromen, never got made, and another called Horrorvision.com came out years later. Band was no stranger to 3D, having previously directed Parasite 3D and Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn in the 1980s. Neal Marshall Stevens, who wrote Head of the Family and Hideous! under the pseudonym Benjamin Carr, penned the script. While it was planned for a 3D release, The Creeps got a 2D release in 1997.

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    Synopsis

    While working in the Rare Books section of the university library, Anna Quarrels (Rhonda Griffin) is approached by Mr. Jamison. He asks if he could study the original manuscript of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, which he switches out for a fake. After discovering the false manuscript, Anna hires David Raleigh (Justin Lauer), a private investigator/video store owner, to investigate. He finds that Mr. Jamison is Dr. Winston Berber (Bill Moynihan), a mad scientist who’s stolen other rare manuscripts. He aims to use them with his “Archetype Inducer” machine to bring four of fiction’s greatest monsters to life. Unfortunately for the doctor, Anna and David retrieve the manuscripts while the monsters are being created, which has unintended results. The Mummy (Joe Smith), The Wolfman (Jon Simanton), Frankenstein’s Monster (Thomas Wellington), and Dracula (Phil Fondacaro) are all pint-sized! Will Berber restore them to full size, or will our heroes stop them?

     

    Review

    If you ever wondered what the Universal Monsters would be like as dwarves, then The Creeps is for you. It’s no secret that Charles Band has an affinity for tiny terrors, usually puppets or miniature demons. Some might find it suspect that the central gimmick is having miniature versions of classic monsters, especially for the time. Thankfully, Charles Band and Benjamin Carr were smart enough not to cram in a bunch of short jokes. Each beast, Dracula in particular, is taken seriously and given familiar but different looks that help set them apart. Phil Fondacaro effortlessly gives the best performance in the film as Dracula, given plenty of monologues to showcase his talents. Unfortunately, the other monsters are given little more than grunts and growls instead of dialogue and deep characterization. They still look like Laurence Olivier when compared to the regular human cast.

    Rhonda Griffin from Hideous! is given the lead but falls short of delivering a quality performance. She comes off as ditzy, whiny, and annoying, making it hard to care when she’s in peril. Justin Lauer plays a stereotypical movie geek/amateur womanizer who mostly spouts off titles of obscure exploitation movies. Bill Moynihan certainly tries as the over-the-top mad scientist, but Phil Fondacaro and his fellow monsters easily overshadow him. Full Moon veteran cinematographer Adolfo Bartoli gives the film style with colored lights and harsh shadows. Given that this was intended to be a 3D movie, there aren’t any moments where objects come toward the camera. At 80 minutes long, the film gets in and out fairly quickly, though it does drag to reach that length. Overall, The Creeps isn’t a bad choice for monster movie fans, but don’t expect anything all that special.

     

    Buy The Creeps from Amazon: https://amzn.to/43YALCK.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)

    Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (2023)

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_3,1_3″ admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]With a $135 million budget, Bumblebee grossed over $460 million worldwide, making it the lowest-grossing of the series. Despite this, the film was the highest-rated entry in the franchise, earning a 91% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. While it wasn’t as commercially successful, Paramount decided to move forward with another sequel, formally announcing it in 2019. Travis Knight chose to return to his animation studio, Laika, so Creed II director Steven Caple Jr. was hired instead. For this installment, the filmmakers incorporated characters from the highly regarded CG-animated series Transformers: Beast Wars. Anthony Ramos and Dominique Fishback played the human leads, with Peter Cullen, Ron Perlman, and Michelle Yeoh voicing the robots. The movie was shot in and around Los Angeles, Peru, Montreal, and Brooklyn from June to October 2021. After premiering in Singapore in May 2023, Transformers: Rise of the Beasts hit theaters worldwide in June.

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    Synopsis

    Noah Diaz (Anthony Ramos) is a tech expert looking for work to support his sick brother Kris (Dean Scott Vazquez). Desperate for money, Noah agrees to steal a Porsche for his friend Reek (Tobe Nwigwe), which doesn’t go as planned. The Porsche turns out to be Mirage (Pete Davidson), one of a handful of Autobots living on Earth. Meanwhile, museum intern Elena Wallace (Dominique Fishback) uncovers a mysterious object that releases a massive energy surge. It just so happens the artifact is part of a key that can open portals through time and space. Its reappearance triggers the arrival of Scourge (Peter Dinklage), leader of the Terrorcons, and the Maximal Airazor (Michelle Yeoh). Airazor leads the Autobots to Peru, where they meet the other Maximals, including their leader Optimus Primal (Ron Perlman). The Autobots and Maximals must stop Scourge before he can restore the key and summon his master, Unicron.

     

    Review

    If you asked me back in 2017 if I was excited about another live-action Transformers movie, I would’ve said “No.” However, after being surprised by how good Bumblebee was, I anxiously anticipated what would come next, hoping for the best. And while it’s not quite as good, Transformers: Rise of the Beasts is leagues above the Michael Bay movies. Like the last installment, the human characters are way more likable and not as insultingly unfunny as the Witwicky family. Anthony Ramos does a great job playing a guy struggling through life and trying to make the most of it. Dominique Fishback can sometimes get annoying, but she gets better and has solid chemistry with Ramos. Like always, Peter Cullen is excellent as Optimus Prime and Ron Perlman gives an equaling commanding performance as Optimus Primal. Michelle Yeoh is also great as Airazor, and Pete Davidson’s Mirage is hilarious.

    Peter Dinklage is virtually unrecognizable as the voice of Scourge, though he does a decent job as the villainous Terrorcon. While the last film was more emotionally driven, this one is more focused on big action sequences. Granted, there are some dramatic moments, such as Noah and Kris’ relationship and the scenes featuring the Maximals. As cool as it is to see Optimus Primal, Cheetor, Rhinox, etc., on screen, they aren’t featured very prominently. Like the other films, this one ends in a big CG-fest of giant robots fighting and blasting each other. Thankfully, you can at least see the action on screen, and it never feels like it’s dragging. Plus, this movie clocks in at two hours and seven minutes, which makes it infinitely better than the Bay films. Overall, Transformers: Rise of the Beasts isn’t perfect, but it’s another step in the right direction.

     

    Buy Transformers: Rise of the Beasts from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3AsX0aF.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Toxic Tutu (2017)

    Toxic Tutu (2017)

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    While not a mega-blockbuster, The Toxic Avenger put Troma on the map and established Lloyd Kaufman as a cult figure. But while their landmark superhero horror-comedy became a cult phenomenon, it didn’t seem to do much for actor Mark Torgl. After playing Melvin the Mop Boy, he didn’t act in anything until Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV in 2001. To commemorate the original’s 30th anniversary, Torgl was invited as a guest to the Mad Monster Party Convention in 2013. While there, Torgl was accompanied by filmmaker Joe Nardelli, who filmed his time at the convention. This sparked an idea between the two to make a mockumentary about Torgl’s whereabouts after the original film. With the fanbase’s and Troma’s support, they raised $4,500 to shoot their fan project, which took roughly four years. In 2017, Toxic Tutu premiered worldwide at that year’s Mad Monster Party Convention, where it all began.

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    Synopsis

    After thirty years of being out of the public light, Mark Torgl makes his first-ever convention appearance. He meets all his loyal fans and is reunited with Lloyd Kaufman, who immortalized him as Melvin the Mop Boy. Unfortunately, before he can take in the sights and sounds, Mark is taken away by armed goons and presumed missing. On The Toxic Avenger, Torgl was exposed to toxic waste, which disfigured his face and has since resurfaced. The sludge has been linked to several deaths, as well as caused heightened sexual stimulation, which makes it highly valuable. At the same time, the kidnappers who abducted Mark are two sisters who specifically want him for their nefarious purposes. As the fans scramble in a panic, a group known as the Tutu Brigade sets out to rescue Mark. What do the sisters want, and what made Mark disappear for so long?

     

    Review

    Long before I started doing Troma Tuesdays regularly, I was a massive fan of the studio and Lloyd Kaufman. As a fan, I was interested in seeing a mockumentary about what happened to Mark Torgl, thinking it’d be fun. Unfortunately, while the film has ambition, Toxic Tutu stumbles over itself and becomes a disappointingly chaotic mess. I understand this movie had a minuscule budget, but I’ve seen much better-looking movies that cost very little. At first, the film starts like a mockumentary, with Mark Torgl being followed around as he tours the convention. There are some genuinely fun moments, and it’s heartwarming seeing Torgl reunite with Kaufman after all these years. Unfortunately, once Mark gets kidnapped, the movie seems to forget it’s a mockumentary and goes off the rails. What follows is so cluttered and all over the place that it’s hard to know what’s happening.

    We jump from Torgl touring a convention to a conspiracy about the toxic waste he ingested and how it resurfaces. Then, there are subplots about rival sisters, the director trying to uncover secrets at Troma, and overly convoluted backstories. I’m all for guerilla filmmaking, and sometimes what you capture in the moment works better, but it doesn’t work here. It doesn’t help that most of the acting is terrible, except for Torgl, Kaufman, Joe Nardelli, and Genoveva Rossi. Granted, there are some fun cameos from Diana Prince, Jake “The Snake” Roberts, Mel Novak, and Shawn Phillips. We get a few interview segments with some of the original cast, which is a nice touch. Still, unless you’re a die-hard Troma fan, you will most likely hate this rather messy and unfocused mockumentary. Overall, Toxic Tutu is a film made by fans for fans, but that’s about it.

     

    Buy Toxic Tutu from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3WSTFsa.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)

    Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_3,1_3″ admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]Against a $90 million budget, 2018’s Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse grossed over $384 million worldwide and received universal critical acclaim. The film earned a 97% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and the Oscar for Best Animated Feature, among other awards. Sony Pictures Animation officially announced a sequel was in production in November 2019, with writers/producers Lord and Miller returning. Directing duties would go to Joaquim Dos Santos, Kemp Powers, and Justin K. Thompson, with Amy Pascal as executive producer. In addition to Shameik Moore and Hailee Steinfeld, almost all of the original cast returned for the sequel. Sony originally planned for an April 2022 release but was pushed back to October due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. That December, Lord and Miller announced the sequel would be split in two, labeled initially as Part 1 and 2. Finally, the retitled Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse swung into theaters in June 2023.

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    Synopsis

    Sixteen months after the last film, Gwen Stacy (Hailee Steinfeld) struggles with being Spider-Woman and being hunted by the police. While fighting a Renaissance-era villain, she runs into Miguel O’Hara/Spider-Man 2099 (Oscar Isaac) and Jessica Drew/Spider-Woman (Issa Rae). Gwen hops throw a dimensional portal with them after revealing her identity to her father, Captain Stacy (Shea Whigham). Meanwhile, Miles Morales (Shameik Moore) is learning to hone his powers while living up to his parent’s expectations. Gwen reunites with Miles one day, but she’s secretly tracking an interdimensional villain called The Spot (Jason Schwartzman). Miles follows her through a dimensional portal and meets the Spider Society, a collection of Spider-People led by Miguel O’Hara. Their mission is to keep the Spider-Verse in working order, but Miles objects when he learns what this entails. What other secrets will be unraveled as Miles Morales tries to untangle this giant web?

     

    Review

    Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse had much to live up to, given how phenomenal the original film was. Thankfully, this sequel lives up to the original as another visually stunning superhero epic with love for the source material. From frame one, the animation is a sight to behold with its vivid colors, changes in style, and surreal imagery. Each universe is given a unique style that helps them stand apart from one another, and they look fantastic. Not only is the animation amazing, but there are tons of great action sequences, each crazier than the last. Thankfully, the action never gets in the way of the storytelling, and they move so fluidly that it’s never distracting. The movie balances out the big action scenes with much smaller, more character-driven scenes, which is not always easy. It helps that the acting is impressive, and the story is riveting.

    Like the last film, Shameik Moore does a great job, this time playing an older yet still naive Miles Morales. Hailee Steinfeld similarly delivers an excellent performance as Gwen Stacy and has fantastic chemistry with Moore. Jake Johnson is a welcome return as Peter B. Parker, and Oscar Isaac is sympathetic and intense as Miguel O’Hara. Some other standouts are Jason Schwartzman as The Spot, Karan Soni as the Indian Spider-Man, and Daniel Kaluuya as Spider-Punk. Also, like the last film, this one is a giant love letter to everything Spider-Man, with cameos and references aplenty. Admittedly, some sequences can get too chaotic, and it can sometimes be hard to see what’s happening. Also, at two hours and twenty minutes, the film does feel a bit too long, but it’s still entertaining. Overall, Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse is another wonderfully animated superhero epic that similar movies should aspire to be.

     

    Buy Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse from Amazon: https://amzn.to/4efh2U7.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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    Where to watch Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)

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  • Buy & Cell (1989)

    Buy & Cell (1989)

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    Originally from New York City, Robert Boris has been a writer/director for TV and movies since the early 1970s. His earliest credits included 1973’s Electra Glide in Blue and 1982’s Some Kind of Hero, starring Richard Pryor. Boris won the WGA Award for Original/Adapted Multi-Part Long Form Series for the 1983 made-for-TV movie Blood Feud. In 1984, Boris made his directorial debut with Oxford Blues, the first starring role for a then up-and-coming Rob Lowe. He followed this up with the 1987 action film Steele Justice, which got the attention of Frank Yablans. In 1987, Yablans and Charles Band produced The Caller, the first of two movies they shot back-to-back at Dinocitta. That same year, Yablans hired Boris to direct a prison-set comedy starring Robert Carradine, Michael Winslow, and Malcolm McDowell. Due to Empire Pictures filing for bankruptcy, Buy & Cell wouldn’t be released until early 1989.

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    Synopsis

    Herbie Altman (Robert Carradine) is sentenced to serve 13 years for stock fraud after being framed by his former boss. He meets with Warden Tennant (Malcolm McDowell), who wants him to help make some investments and make him rich. Altman refuses, so he’s placed in his cell with the smooth-talking hustler Sly (Michael Winslow), who has some outstanding debts. Sly owes $25,000 to fellow inmates Cowboy (Roddy Piper) and Raoul (Tony Plana), so Altman offers to help. Not only does he help Sly pay off his debts, but Altman decides to form his own company, Con Inc. With the help of prison therapist Dr. Ellen Scott (Lise Cutter), Herbie and the other inmates become wealthy investors. Soon, the warden wants a piece of the action, so he and Altman join forces to one-up Altman’s old boss. But whether it’s finances or prison, Herbie can’t catch a break.

     

    Review

    Buy & Cell isn’t what you would expect from an Empire Pictures film, which isn’t necessarily bad. Unfortunately, this is a comedy that forgot to be funny since most of the jokes fall flat. This is one of many slobs vs. snobs movies popular in the 80s, like Caddyshack and Police Academy. Sadly, by this point, the formula had gone stale, and they just weren’t as funny as they used to be. It doesn’t help that the “comedy” starts roughly 40 minutes in, as the first act is deadly serious. Just the fact that this supposedly zany comedy begins with a gag involving a suicide attempt is jarring. Even when the humor does kick in, there’s never a moment where I let out anything more than a chuckle. That said, a few lines here and there caught me off guard, so that counts for something.

    It’s a shame the film isn’t funny because the cast can deliver laughs in other movies. Robert Carradine, aka Lewis in Revenge of the Nerds, makes for a decent lead and works as the straight man. As always, Malcolm McDowell plays a great villain, and it’s fun seeing him get his comeuppance at the end. Michael Winslow, famous for his sound effects in Police Academy, has sadly run out of steam here. While he doesn’t always make his trademark sounds, it’s pretty clear it was a one-note schtick that’s run its course. The cast also features great character actors like Roddy Piper, Randall ‘Tex’ Cobb, Ben Vereen, and Tony Plana. They do their best to make this 95-minute comedy work, but the material doesn’t give them much to work with. Overall, Buy & Cell is a forgettable comedy with little to offer besides a decent cast.

     

    Buy Buy & Cell from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3JGQrpM.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at no additional cost, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and make a purchase.

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    Where to watch Buy & Cell (1989)

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  • Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

    Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

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    From the late 1960s to the mid-1970s, Donn Davison made a name for himself in the exploitation scene. After getting his start working on various roadshows, he decided to pursue filmmaking after receiving encouragement from Ron Ormond. In 1968, Davison released Moonshiner’s Woman, which he wrote, produced, directed, and starred in, to great success. Davison followed this up with the 1971 hicksploitation film Shantytown Honeymoon, which was rereleased as Honey Britches in 1972. Afterward, Davison started doing promotions for Film Ventures International, an independent company founded in 1968 that went bankrupt in 1985. Years later, exploitation filmmaker Fred Olen Ray acquired the rights to the film and inserted new footage of John Carradine. The new scenes had Carradine as “The Judge of Hell,” who narrates throughout the film as it goes on. Ray sold the movie to Troma, who released it as Demented Death Farm Massacre in 1986.

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    Synopsis

    Jewel thieves Phillip (Jim Peck), Kirk (Michael Battlesmith), Karen (Trudy Moore), and Suzanne (Pepper Thurston) are on the run. While driving through the remote Carolinas, their Jeep runs out of gas, so they ditch it and find shelter. They come across local moonshiner Horlon P. Craven (George Ellis) and his young wife Reba Sue (Ashley Brooks). It’s not long until the thieves take advantage of their hospitality, with Kirk moving in on Horlon’s wife. During a scuffle, Reba Sue accidentally kills Karen, which leads to the other thieves threatening Horlon. Phillip and Kirk plan on taking over Horlon’s moonshine business and a supposed fortune that he has hidden away. Soon, the temptations of the diamonds, moonshine, and Reba Sue lead to the thieves’ downfall at Horlon’s hands. Who will survive and strike it rich from this demented death farm massacre? No one but The Judge of Hell (John Carradine) knows.

     

    Review

    Admittedly, Demented Death Farm Massacre is a movie whose backstory is more interesting than the movie itself. Hell, reading through a list of the film’s alternative titles is funnier than any of the gags in the movie. In addition to Shantytown Honeymoon and Honey Britches, there’s also Hillbilly Hooker, Honey Pie, and Little Whorehouse on the Prairie. That last title makes me wonder if the makers of Little House on the Prairie tried suing the filmmakers. Aside from the backstory and the many alternative titles, this is a barely watchable slice of 1970s exploitation trash. Granted, you shouldn’t go into a movie like this expecting something like The Godfather, but this one is rough. The story is paper-thin, none of the characters are likable, and it’s relatively light on the exploitation. Sure, there’s some blood and scantily clad women, but it’s not nearly as sleazy as its title suggests.

    It says a lot about the acting when John Carradine, who only has five minutes of screen time, performs best. Granted, he looks confused and was only added after the fact, but he’s at least committed to the material. Everyone else is loud, obnoxious, scummy, or stupid, with everyone mugging for the camera, especially Ashley Brooks. Admittedly, George Ellis is mildly entertaining as the Bible-thumping moonshiner who loves to call women “whores” and “tramps.” Jim Peck tries adding a bit of class with his performance as ringleader Phillip, but even he can’t save it. Much of the film consists of boring talking scenes, characters stumbling around, or poorly-staged fights. There are a few unintentionally funny moments at an hour and twenty-five minutes, but most of it is a slog. Overall, Demented Death Farm Massacre might be worth a watch if you’re curious, but it’s best left forgotten.

     

    Buy Demented Death Farm Massacre from Amazon: https://amzn.to/43RhTph.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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    Where to watch Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

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  • Honor Killing (2018)

    Honor Killing (2018)

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    An “honor killing” refers to someone killed for a perceived dishonor against a family, either an outsider or a member. Men usually commit these acts against women, which is common in Middle Eastern countries like Pakistan and India. These are often triggered by refusing an arranged marriage, wanting a divorce, being a rape victim, or even homosexuality. While the act is generally frowned upon in most parts of the world, honor killings are heralded in certain countries. Mercedes the Muse, the actress/c0-writer of Rose and Viktor: No Mercy, decided to tackle this subject. This film would be her directorial debut, taking inspiration from Thriller: A Cruel Picture and I Spit on Your Grave. She intended to empower women and speak on a controversial subject with the typical sleaze found in grindhouse movies. In early 2018, Troma released Mercedes’ directorial debut, Honor Killing.

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    Synopsis

    While walking home from the library, a young woman (Mercedes the Muse) is assaulted and raped by some gang members. Upon returning home, she asks her mother (Virginia Puccio) for help but is ostracized for bringing shame to the family. Her father (Sam Lopez) shoots her in the eye and leaves her for dead, only for her to reawaken. After recovering, the woman hires bounty hunter Viktor (Jim Schumacher) to train her to use weapons and hurt people. With her training, she kills the men who raped her and plans on getting revenge against her father. She also saves a prostitute (Vivi Marie), a stripper (Erin Shimokawa), and a biker babe (Soma Stardust) from abusive men. She even runs into a cult led by a deranged man (Cash Hann) and rescues the women under his influence. Soon, her father will get his comeuppance for his honor killing!

     

    Review

    Honor Killing is a narrative mess of a film, but it has ambition and a message to tell. While it does borrow from several other rape-revenge films, it helps that it’s based on something happening in real life. The most significant comparison would be Thriller: A Cruel Picture, from the one-eyed lead to them hunting their father. But while Mercedes tries her best, the movie doesn’t entirely work, primarily due to the poor cinematography and inconsistent acting. So many scenes are shot so close, and the camera shakes so much that it’s hard to tell what’s happening. It makes sense for the more intense moments, but even the ordinary scenes are like this, and it’s disorientating. Most of the acting is flat, with actors underacting and saying their lines like they’re reading off cue cards. Even Mercedes, despite her efforts, doesn’t sound convincing when she’s trying to be tough.

    Much like Rose & Viktor, most of this film consists of random vignettes that don’t necessarily tie together. It’s cool to see our hero save a prostitute from an abusive pimp, but it doesn’t advance the story. Also, aside from the rape that sets everything in motion, most of the violence is pretty tame, which is surprising. I’m not saying a rape-revenge film needs to be super gory, but this is a lot lighter than you’d expect. Part of the appeal of these films is seeing rapists and abusers getting punished in satisfyingly brutal ways. There are a few decent kills, but don’t expect anything like the castration from I Spit on Your Grave. The movie feels padded at just barely over an hour, so this might’ve worked better as a short film. Overall, Honor Killing certainly tries, but it doesn’t quite hit the mark. 

     

    Buy Honor Killing from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3q7ivs0.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Deadly Daphne’s Revenge (1987)

    Deadly Daphne’s Revenge (1987)

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    In its nearly 50-year history, Troma has become infamous for many things, including mismarketing some of its films. For instance, they tried selling Combat Shock as an all-out action film when it’s more of a character study. There was also The Dead Come Home, which they sold as a horror-comedy called Dead Dudes in the House. Other times, they’ll retitle a film, such as You Better Watch Out being retitled as Christmas Evil. Thankfully, Troma never recuts or reedits the films, but the mismarketing can lead to confusion. Such is the case with The Hunting Season, a rape-revenge film from Orange County by writer/director/star Richard Gardner. While the movie was initially released around 1979-1981, Troma acquired the rights and released it on VHS in 1987. Since then, the film has been rereleased on DVD and Blu-ray with the title Deadly Daphne’s Revenge.

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    Synopsis

    Charlie Johnson (Anthony Holt) and his friends Steve (Richard Gardner), Bruce, and Bobo are taking a weekend RV trip. Along the way, they pick up seventeen-year-old hitchhiker Cindy (Laurie Tait Partridge), who’s immediately put off by Charlie’s bigotry. She confides in Steve and even makes love to him, but Charlie and Bobo rape her after he leaves. Steve confronts Charlie the following day while Cindy runs off to try and press charges against Charlie. While her lawyer Starke can help her, Cindy is reluctant because he insists they prosecute all four men, including Steve. Charlie and Bobo get arrested, and while they’re eventually let out, the story spreads like wildfire across town. Steve loses his high school coaching job, Bruce kills himself over the guilt, and Cindy is second-guessing her decision. Little do they know that a woman from Charlie’s past named Daphne is seeking her deadly revenge!

     

    Review

    Mismarketing aside, Deadly Daphne’s Revenge is one of the weirdest rape-revenge movies I’ve ever seen. Rather than going the I Spit on Your Grave route of the attackers getting killed, this becomes a legal drama. While it’s unique, you wouldn’t expect a sleazy exploitation movie to turn into The Accused years before that came out. It’s interesting to see this obscure exploitation film tackle issues of double standards and victim blaming in a nuanced way. Unfortunately, whatever points the filmmakers tried to make are outdone by the acting, which ranges from mediocre to ridiculously over-the-top. Anthony Holt, in particular, is so stereotypically hateful that it comes off as one-note, which clashes with the serious tone. Laurie Tait Partridge is decent, and it’s easy to root for her, but she doesn’t leave much of an impression. Also, the titular Daphne gets her revenge but doesn’t appear until the last 10 minutes.

    The rest of the cast is largely forgettable, although a pre-Fresh Prince of Bel-Air James Avery has a minor role. Aside from that, I’ve touched on just about everything there is to say about this movie. While the rape scene is appropriately disturbing, the revenge aspect is very unsatisfying and lacks the punch of similar films. There’s nothing on par with a crossbow-wielding Linda Blair in Savage Streets or architect-turned-vigilante Charles Bronson in Death Wish. Sure, the filmmakers handled the subject matter more objectively, which is commendable, but it could’ve been better. I can only imagine Troma fans’ disappointment when they popped this in the VCRs back in the day. It doesn’t help that they were probably confused about why the lead woman wasn’t named Daphne like the title. Overall, Deadly Daphne’s Revenge is a film whose title is more interesting than the actual movie.

     

    Buy Deadly Daphne’s Revenge from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3IC39lV.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Robot Holocaust (1987)

    Robot Holocaust (1987)

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    As stated in previous reviews, Charles Band formed Wizard Video after being forced out of Meda (later Media) Home Entertainment. Band released several oddball exploitation films through this label, including Zombie, The Driller Killer, and The Boogeyman. In addition to acquiring the distribution rights for foreign cinema, Band made some in-house productions, including compilations and direct-to-video movies. Except for The Best of Sex and Violence and Psychos In Love, most of these were pretty dreadful. Enter Tim Kincaid, the New York-based adult filmmaker who transitioned to mainstream movies with Bad Girls Dormitory. Kincaid and Band made a deal where Tim would produce several low-budget genre films for Wizard Video, starting with Breeders. His next film for Band became arguably his most infamous for appearing on the second season of Mystery Science Theater 3000. That movie would be the 1987 post-apocalyptic sci-fi film Robot Holocaust.

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    Synopsis

    Society has all but collapsed after a robot revolution that took place in the far future of 2033. The remaining humans are either slaves to the robots and their leader, The Dark One, or nomads roaming the wasteland. The Dark One is an advanced computer aided by the human Valaria (Angelika Jager) and the robot Torque (Rick Gianasi). A scientist named Jorn (Michael Downend) is imprisoned since he’s the only one who can stop The Dark One. His daughter Deeja (Nadine Hart) searches for someone to help rescue him and finds a drifter named Neo (Norris Culf). With his robot sidekick Kylton (Joel Van Ornsteiner), Neo agrees to help and gathers other drifters to aid them. With humanity’s fate at stake, our heroes must trek across the New York ruins to stop The Dark One. It’s man versus machine as the two sides clash in this robot holocaust!

     

    Review

    Much like his 1986 movie Breeders, Robot Holocaust sounds like it’ll be a fun watch, but it’s largely uninteresting. Granted, this one is less painful of an experience, but that’s saying little considering what we’re comparing. The biggest problem with this film is that most of it is either exposition dumps or characters just walking. What makes matters worse is that the characters could be more memorable, and the acting could be more exciting, though there are exceptions. On top of being gorgeous, Angelika Jager is the film’s highlight, as she’s chewing up all the scenery. Like before, Ed French’s effects work is decent, given the limited resources he had to work with. While some monsters look like cheap hand-puppets, the robots are pretty cool, especially Torque’s design. That explains why the Blu-Ray cover features him prominently despite not being the central villain.

    Honestly, this movie is hard to review because there’s little to say about it, and I’ve covered almost everything. Another strike against the film is the constant narration explaining everything we see as if we’re blind. It makes Harrison Ford’s narration in Blade Runner sound profound by comparison, and that was a great movie. The film reuses music from other Charles Band productions like Laserblast, which is fitting since it was also on MST3K. I’d almost prefer watching that movie instead since it at least had stop-motion aliens, explosions, and Eddie Deezen. While it does get slightly more exciting in the last 20 minutes, it’s hardly worth the first 50. The movie clocks in at roughly 80 minutes and feels like the longest 80 minutes imaginable. Overall, Robot Holocaust is less “so bad it’s good” but more “so boring it’s bad.”

     

    Buy Robot Holocaust from Amazon: https://amzn.to/43w5ZR9.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Subspecies V: Blood Rise (2023)

    Subspecies V: Blood Rise (2023)

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_3,1_3″ admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]After the disappointing response to Subspecies IV: Bloodstorm, the series was put on hiatus for the next decade. As new franchises like Killjoy, The Gingerdead Man, and Evil Bong were introduced, hopes for Radu’s return seemed lost. Over the years, writer/director Ted Nicolaou and actors Anders Hove and Denice Duff wanted to return to the series. Nicolaou had even written a script for a potential new installment should Full Moon acquire the budget needed. In 2019, Charles Band announced that a fifth Subspecies film was in production as part of his “Deadly 10” initiative. Filming was supposed to start in July 2020 in Croatia, but the COVID-19 pandemic put the project on hold. The movie was shot over 18 days in Serbia in September 2022 before premiering at the Horrorhound Convention in March. After 25 years, Subspecies V: Blood Rise hit Alamo Drafthouse theaters in May 2023.

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    Synopsis

    During the Crusades, a knight rescues a vampire baby before it’s offered up as a sacrifice by its mother. After being defanged, the child is raised to serve the church and slay monsters, not knowing his origin. The vampire-turned-knight Radu (Anders Hove), accompanied by the monk Marius (Petar Arsic), infiltrates the castle of Prince Vladislas (Kevin Spirtas). After driving away the vampires, the two find Helena (Denice Duff), the mother of Vladislas’ child Stefan (Jakov Marjanovic). Despite Marius ‘ objections, Radu vows to protect them, so they go their separate ways, not knowing Helena is a vampire. She turns Radu and leaves with Vladislas and the Bloodstone, though Radu is found by his mother, Circe (Yulia Graut). After Circe trains him, Radu takes siblings Ariel (Stasa Nikolic) and Ash (Marko Filipovic) as his fledglings. Despite growing more powerful, Radu is still haunted by visions of his love, Helena.

     

    Review

    Let’s be frank; Full Moon Features has never been as good as it was in the early 1990s. Sure, they had some movies in the 2000s that were decent, but none were on par with their earlier work. While that era of Full Moon likely won’t return, Subspecies V: Blood Rise is the closest we’ll come to that. Using the locations and Vladimir Ilic’s excellent cinematography, Nicolaou recaptured the classic goth look of the earlier installments. While it would’ve been great for them to shoot in Romania like before, Serbia is a great stand-in. The sets look great, and the many landscape shots of the Serbian countryside add to the ambiance. The costumes and makeup effects look fantastic, and the Serbian crew deserves all the credit they get. Full Moon went above and beyond to make this the best sequel possible, and they more than succeeded.

    In addition to looking good, the film has some of the best performances I’ve seen in a Full Moon movie. Anders Hove is just as sinister as before, but he also comes off as somewhat sympathetic and pulls it off. Denice Duff is excellent as Helena, who looks great for her age and succeeds at being seductive and manipulative. The dynamic she and Hove have is a complete reversal of their relationship in the previous films, and it works. While he’s not in the movie much, Kevin Spirtas is having fun as the sinister Prince Vladislas. Stasa Nikolic and Marko Filipovic are great additions to the cast, and their backstory is just as tragic as Radu’s. While the film has plenty of blood and nudity, it takes itself more seriously, which might disappoint some fans. Otherwise, Subspecies V: Blood Rise is easily Full Moon’s best film in decades!

     

    Buy Subspecies V: Blood Rise from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3UvTRxO.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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