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Category: Comedy

  • Barbie (2023)

    Barbie (2023)

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_3,1_3″ admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]In 1959, American businesswoman Ruth Handler created Barbie, a doll made for little girls based on Germany’s Bild Lilli. Ruth’s husband Elliot co-founded the toy company Mattel, so she brought the doll to him, and the rest is history. Since its inception, Mattel has sold over a billion Barbie dolls and just as many accessories, clothes, vehicles, etc. In 2009, Mattel announced that Universal would work on a live-action movie, but nothing came of it. Sony Pictures was brought on to produce in 2014, with Amy Schumer and Anne Hathaway both in talks to star. Unfortunately, numerous delays led to Mattel reacquiring the rights and partnering with Warner Bros, leading to Margot Robbie being cast. Also serving as a producer, Robbie hired Greta Gerwig to direct, who agreed if her partner Noah Baumbach co-wrote. Following a few reshoots, Barbie finally hit the silver screen in July 2023.

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    Synopsis

    Life in Barbieland is splendid as Barbie (Margot Robbie) lives her days with her fellow Barbies and Ken (Ryan Gosling). However, things turn sour when Barbie starts asking about death, her routine is thrown off, and her feet go flat. She consults Weird Barbie (Kate McKinnon) for help, and Weird Barbie suggests she find the child playing with her. With Ken stowing away in her car, Barbie travels to Venice Beach, where they almost immediately get arrested. While Barbie looks for her owner, Ken wanders off and learns about the patriarchy, leaving Barbie to spread the word. Elsewhere, Barbie and Ken’s antics get the attention of Mattel’s CEO (Will Ferrell), who’s determined to bring them in. Soon, Barbie finds her owner, Sasha (Ariana Greenblatt), who drops some harsh truths on her, making her question her existence. Things only worsen once Barbie sees what Ken has done to their home.

     

    Review

    To get this out of the way, Barbie is a feminist “take down the patriarchy” movie through and through. I’m not here to discuss gender politics, societal roles, or anything like that, so I’m not getting into that. As to the movie itself, I think there’s a lot to like about it, from the performances to the directing. First, I can’t think of anyone other than Margot Robbie playing a live-action Barbie, and she nails it. Not only does she look and fit the part, but she has a great character arc as her worldview expands. Ryan Gosling steals the show as Ken and shows off his comedic talent through his back-and-forths with Robbie. He’s hilarious when he’s just Ken and even funnier once he brings the patriarchy back to Barbieland. Also, Michael Cera is memorable as the even more forgotten Alan, somehow more pathetic than Ken.

    The production design for Barbieland is a sight to behold, feeling like a dollhouse come to life. It reminds me of the neighborhood from Tim Burton’s Edward Scissorhands, looking so idyllic that it’s almost creepy. It’s a great contrast to the mundanity of Los Angeles, though I almost wish more time was spent in Barbieland. While some jokes land, quite a few miss the mark and go overboard explaining the joke. Sometimes, it feels like the filmmakers interrupt the movie to preach about gender equality and women’s rights. Also, so many characters are packed in that it can be overwhelming, especially when most have the same name. At slightly under two hours long, there isn’t a ton of padding, and it moves at a decent pace. Overall, Barbie has some good qualities, but some material might be somewhat offputting for certain audience members.

     

    Buy Barbie from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3YMAjrp.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Toxic Tutu (2017)

    Toxic Tutu (2017)

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    While not a mega-blockbuster, The Toxic Avenger put Troma on the map and established Lloyd Kaufman as a cult figure. But while their landmark superhero horror-comedy became a cult phenomenon, it didn’t seem to do much for actor Mark Torgl. After playing Melvin the Mop Boy, he didn’t act in anything until Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV in 2001. To commemorate the original’s 30th anniversary, Torgl was invited as a guest to the Mad Monster Party Convention in 2013. While there, Torgl was accompanied by filmmaker Joe Nardelli, who filmed his time at the convention. This sparked an idea between the two to make a mockumentary about Torgl’s whereabouts after the original film. With the fanbase’s and Troma’s support, they raised $4,500 to shoot their fan project, which took roughly four years. In 2017, Toxic Tutu premiered worldwide at that year’s Mad Monster Party Convention, where it all began.

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    Synopsis

    After thirty years of being out of the public light, Mark Torgl makes his first-ever convention appearance. He meets all his loyal fans and is reunited with Lloyd Kaufman, who immortalized him as Melvin the Mop Boy. Unfortunately, before he can take in the sights and sounds, Mark is taken away by armed goons and presumed missing. On The Toxic Avenger, Torgl was exposed to toxic waste, which disfigured his face and has since resurfaced. The sludge has been linked to several deaths, as well as caused heightened sexual stimulation, which makes it highly valuable. At the same time, the kidnappers who abducted Mark are two sisters who specifically want him for their nefarious purposes. As the fans scramble in a panic, a group known as the Tutu Brigade sets out to rescue Mark. What do the sisters want, and what made Mark disappear for so long?

     

    Review

    Long before I started doing Troma Tuesdays regularly, I was a massive fan of the studio and Lloyd Kaufman. As a fan, I was interested in seeing a mockumentary about what happened to Mark Torgl, thinking it’d be fun. Unfortunately, while the film has ambition, Toxic Tutu stumbles over itself and becomes a disappointingly chaotic mess. I understand this movie had a minuscule budget, but I’ve seen much better-looking movies that cost very little. At first, the film starts like a mockumentary, with Mark Torgl being followed around as he tours the convention. There are some genuinely fun moments, and it’s heartwarming seeing Torgl reunite with Kaufman after all these years. Unfortunately, once Mark gets kidnapped, the movie seems to forget it’s a mockumentary and goes off the rails. What follows is so cluttered and all over the place that it’s hard to know what’s happening.

    We jump from Torgl touring a convention to a conspiracy about the toxic waste he ingested and how it resurfaces. Then, there are subplots about rival sisters, the director trying to uncover secrets at Troma, and overly convoluted backstories. I’m all for guerilla filmmaking, and sometimes what you capture in the moment works better, but it doesn’t work here. It doesn’t help that most of the acting is terrible, except for Torgl, Kaufman, Joe Nardelli, and Genoveva Rossi. Granted, there are some fun cameos from Diana Prince, Jake “The Snake” Roberts, Mel Novak, and Shawn Phillips. We get a few interview segments with some of the original cast, which is a nice touch. Still, unless you’re a die-hard Troma fan, you will most likely hate this rather messy and unfocused mockumentary. Overall, Toxic Tutu is a film made by fans for fans, but that’s about it.

     

    Buy Toxic Tutu from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3WSTFsa.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Buy & Cell (1989)

    Buy & Cell (1989)

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    Originally from New York City, Robert Boris has been a writer/director for TV and movies since the early 1970s. His earliest credits included 1973’s Electra Glide in Blue and 1982’s Some Kind of Hero, starring Richard Pryor. Boris won the WGA Award for Original/Adapted Multi-Part Long Form Series for the 1983 made-for-TV movie Blood Feud. In 1984, Boris made his directorial debut with Oxford Blues, the first starring role for a then up-and-coming Rob Lowe. He followed this up with the 1987 action film Steele Justice, which got the attention of Frank Yablans. In 1987, Yablans and Charles Band produced The Caller, the first of two movies they shot back-to-back at Dinocitta. That same year, Yablans hired Boris to direct a prison-set comedy starring Robert Carradine, Michael Winslow, and Malcolm McDowell. Due to Empire Pictures filing for bankruptcy, Buy & Cell wouldn’t be released until early 1989.

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    Synopsis

    Herbie Altman (Robert Carradine) is sentenced to serve 13 years for stock fraud after being framed by his former boss. He meets with Warden Tennant (Malcolm McDowell), who wants him to help make some investments and make him rich. Altman refuses, so he’s placed in his cell with the smooth-talking hustler Sly (Michael Winslow), who has some outstanding debts. Sly owes $25,000 to fellow inmates Cowboy (Roddy Piper) and Raoul (Tony Plana), so Altman offers to help. Not only does he help Sly pay off his debts, but Altman decides to form his own company, Con Inc. With the help of prison therapist Dr. Ellen Scott (Lise Cutter), Herbie and the other inmates become wealthy investors. Soon, the warden wants a piece of the action, so he and Altman join forces to one-up Altman’s old boss. But whether it’s finances or prison, Herbie can’t catch a break.

     

    Review

    Buy & Cell isn’t what you would expect from an Empire Pictures film, which isn’t necessarily bad. Unfortunately, this is a comedy that forgot to be funny since most of the jokes fall flat. This is one of many slobs vs. snobs movies popular in the 80s, like Caddyshack and Police Academy. Sadly, by this point, the formula had gone stale, and they just weren’t as funny as they used to be. It doesn’t help that the “comedy” starts roughly 40 minutes in, as the first act is deadly serious. Just the fact that this supposedly zany comedy begins with a gag involving a suicide attempt is jarring. Even when the humor does kick in, there’s never a moment where I let out anything more than a chuckle. That said, a few lines here and there caught me off guard, so that counts for something.

    It’s a shame the film isn’t funny because the cast can deliver laughs in other movies. Robert Carradine, aka Lewis in Revenge of the Nerds, makes for a decent lead and works as the straight man. As always, Malcolm McDowell plays a great villain, and it’s fun seeing him get his comeuppance at the end. Michael Winslow, famous for his sound effects in Police Academy, has sadly run out of steam here. While he doesn’t always make his trademark sounds, it’s pretty clear it was a one-note schtick that’s run its course. The cast also features great character actors like Roddy Piper, Randall ‘Tex’ Cobb, Ben Vereen, and Tony Plana. They do their best to make this 95-minute comedy work, but the material doesn’t give them much to work with. Overall, Buy & Cell is a forgettable comedy with little to offer besides a decent cast.

     

    Buy Buy & Cell from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3JGQrpM.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at no additional cost, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and make a purchase.

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    Where to watch Buy & Cell (1989)

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  • Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

    Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

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    From the late 1960s to the mid-1970s, Donn Davison made a name for himself in the exploitation scene. After getting his start working on various roadshows, he decided to pursue filmmaking after receiving encouragement from Ron Ormond. In 1968, Davison released Moonshiner’s Woman, which he wrote, produced, directed, and starred in, to great success. Davison followed this up with the 1971 hicksploitation film Shantytown Honeymoon, which was rereleased as Honey Britches in 1972. Afterward, Davison started doing promotions for Film Ventures International, an independent company founded in 1968 that went bankrupt in 1985. Years later, exploitation filmmaker Fred Olen Ray acquired the rights to the film and inserted new footage of John Carradine. The new scenes had Carradine as “The Judge of Hell,” who narrates throughout the film as it goes on. Ray sold the movie to Troma, who released it as Demented Death Farm Massacre in 1986.

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    Synopsis

    Jewel thieves Phillip (Jim Peck), Kirk (Michael Battlesmith), Karen (Trudy Moore), and Suzanne (Pepper Thurston) are on the run. While driving through the remote Carolinas, their Jeep runs out of gas, so they ditch it and find shelter. They come across local moonshiner Horlon P. Craven (George Ellis) and his young wife Reba Sue (Ashley Brooks). It’s not long until the thieves take advantage of their hospitality, with Kirk moving in on Horlon’s wife. During a scuffle, Reba Sue accidentally kills Karen, which leads to the other thieves threatening Horlon. Phillip and Kirk plan on taking over Horlon’s moonshine business and a supposed fortune that he has hidden away. Soon, the temptations of the diamonds, moonshine, and Reba Sue lead to the thieves’ downfall at Horlon’s hands. Who will survive and strike it rich from this demented death farm massacre? No one but The Judge of Hell (John Carradine) knows.

     

    Review

    Admittedly, Demented Death Farm Massacre is a movie whose backstory is more interesting than the movie itself. Hell, reading through a list of the film’s alternative titles is funnier than any of the gags in the movie. In addition to Shantytown Honeymoon and Honey Britches, there’s also Hillbilly Hooker, Honey Pie, and Little Whorehouse on the Prairie. That last title makes me wonder if the makers of Little House on the Prairie tried suing the filmmakers. Aside from the backstory and the many alternative titles, this is a barely watchable slice of 1970s exploitation trash. Granted, you shouldn’t go into a movie like this expecting something like The Godfather, but this one is rough. The story is paper-thin, none of the characters are likable, and it’s relatively light on the exploitation. Sure, there’s some blood and scantily clad women, but it’s not nearly as sleazy as its title suggests.

    It says a lot about the acting when John Carradine, who only has five minutes of screen time, performs best. Granted, he looks confused and was only added after the fact, but he’s at least committed to the material. Everyone else is loud, obnoxious, scummy, or stupid, with everyone mugging for the camera, especially Ashley Brooks. Admittedly, George Ellis is mildly entertaining as the Bible-thumping moonshiner who loves to call women “whores” and “tramps.” Jim Peck tries adding a bit of class with his performance as ringleader Phillip, but even he can’t save it. Much of the film consists of boring talking scenes, characters stumbling around, or poorly-staged fights. There are a few unintentionally funny moments at an hour and twenty-five minutes, but most of it is a slog. Overall, Demented Death Farm Massacre might be worth a watch if you’re curious, but it’s best left forgotten.

     

    Buy Demented Death Farm Massacre from Amazon: https://amzn.to/43RhTph.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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    Where to watch Demented Death Farm Massacre (1972)

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  • Assault of the Killer Bimbos (1988)

    Assault of the Killer Bimbos (1988)

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_3,1_3″ admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.21.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]At the 1987 Cannes Film Festival, Charles Band launched a pre-sales campaign for the yet-to-be-filmed Assault of the Killer Bimbos. The title was a hit, so Band hired Gorman Bechard of Psychos in Love and Galactic Gigolo fame to direct. Unfortunately, Bechard’s initial cut was deemed so bad that Band decided to redo the movie entirely. Charlie had David DeCoteau salvage the project, so he hired Anita Rosenberg and Patti Astor to write and direct. Rosenberg and Astor turned in their script, but Empire wasn’t confident, so they had Ted Nicolaou do an extensive rewrite. With a budget of $250,000, this would be Rosenberg’s first feature film, though she was almost replaced during filming. When Empire Pictures got cold feet, they wanted Nicolaou to step in, but he believed in Rosenberg and declined. Ultimately, Anita Rosenberg’s Assault of the Killer Bimbos had a small theatrical run in May 1988.

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    Synopsis

    Lulu (Elizabeth Kaitan) is a waitress at a go-go club who aspires to be a dancer. With encouragement from her friend, go-go dancer Peaches (Christina Whitaker), Lulu hits the stage but gets booed off. To make matters worse, a sleazy gangster named Big Vinnie (Mike Muscat) kills their boss and frames them for it. The girls decide to flee to Mexico to escape law enforcement until they figure out what to do next. Along the way, they pick up a diner waitress, Darlene (Tammara Souza), who agrees to help them. The girls get into car chases with cops, run into three stoner surfers, and wind up at a fleabag motel. While holding up at the motel, the girls run into Vinnie, who’s there with his girlfriend Poodles (Patti Astor). Vinnie thinks he’s in the clear until he encounters the Assault of the Killer Bimbos!

     

    Review

    Despite how sleazy the title sounds, Assault of the Killer Bimbos is light-hearted and less exploitative than expected. Sure, there is some nudity, but for the most part, the female leads keep all their clothes on. Also, contrary to the title, the “bimbos” aren’t killers, nor do they go on an assault. Even if the title doesn’t accurately represent the film, it seems fitting for how wacky and silly it is. B-movie staple Elizabeth Kaitan is as adorable as ever and has fantastic chemistry with Christina Whitaker. Tammara Souza is an excellent addition to the group, though she doesn’t fit what most would call a “bimbo.” It’s also worth noting that this features a relatively-unknown Nick Cassavetes as a stoner/surfer who becomes Kaitan’s love interest. He’s not bad, but I highly doubt the director of The Notebook talks about this movie much.

    If the plot sounds familiar, that’s probably because it resembles Ridley Scott’s 1991 film Thema & Louise. Supposedly, the producers of Assault tried suing the makers of Thelma & Louise but withdrew due to legal costs. I’m not saying Scott or Callie Khouri intentionally ripped this off, but it’s a strange coincidence. As for this movie, it’s an interestingly feminist-centric road adventure with some light comedy and various hijinks. Admittedly, several of the jokes don’t land, but a few chuckle-worthy moments are sprinkled in. The movie tends to slow down whenever the stoner surfers are introduced, as they feel out of place. At 85 minutes, the film moves briskly, though a few slow spots could’ve been trimmed. Overall, Assault of the Killer Bimbos might not be what you expect, but it’s a decent watch. Sadly, the same can’t be said for its sister film, but that’s for another day.

     

    Buy Assault of the Killer Bimbos from Amazon: https://amzn.to/4ffBKEI.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Dr. Alien (1989)

    Dr. Alien (1989)

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    Unfortunately, by 1988, Empire Pictures was on the verge of bankruptcy after a series of box office failures. Additionally, the studio owed a substantial debt to Crédit Lyonnais, and they were threatening to buy the studio’s assets. During this period, Scott Spiegel’s Intruder and J.F. Lawton’s Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death were in production. David DeCoteau, who directed three movies for Empire, was making a new film with effects artist/writer Kenneth J. Hall. Originally titled I Was a Teenage Sex Mutant, filming commenced in LA for 19 days during the 1988 Writer’s Strike. During production, DeCoteau got word that Empire was going bankrupt but continued filming since the banks were unaware. After Empire folded, Charles Band founded Full Moon Features, using DeCoteau’s movie to strike a deal with Paramount Pictures. The agreement was made, and Paramount released DeCoteau’s film, now retitled Dr. Alien, in 1989.

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    Synopsis

    Wesley Littlejohn (Billy Jacoby) is your average nerdy high schooler who’s constantly picked on and can’t get a girl. His best friend, Marvin (Stuart Fratkin), pressures him to talk to his crush Leanne (Olivia Barash), but he fumbles. Little do they know that they have a new biology teacher, Ms. Xenobia (Judy Landers), who’s more than she seems. She has Wesley stay after class for an experiment that involves her assistant, Drax (Raymond O’Connor), injecting him with “vitamins.” However, it turns out the vitamins make a weird growth sprout from Wesley’s head that makes him irresistible to women. This boosts Wesley’s confidence, leading him to change his wardrobe and sing in a metal band. He even gets to go out with Leanne, but his magnetism for women makes her think he’s cheating on her. On top of it all, Ms. Xenobia is an alien trying to repopulate her homeworld!

     

    Review

    Let’s get this out of the way: Dr. Alien is a dumb, somewhat sexist movie that hasn’t aged well. That being said, this is a surprisingly funny sci-fi sex comedy that’s way more enjoyable than you’d expect. Sure, the whole “nerdy guy gains confidence, stands up to bullies, and gets the girl” story is tired and cliche. However, David DeCoteau manages to take that material and inject it with a self-aware tone that homages 50s Corman movies. While there’s plenty of nudity, foul language, and sexual innuendos, the overall film has a feel-good nature to it. It doesn’t feel mean-spirited or vile, but like you’re meant to have as much fun as the cast is having. Some of the jokes don’t quite land, but some moments had me chuckling throughout, thanks to the dry delivery. Plus, all the topless women certainly kept my attention.

    Cinematographer Nicholas Von Sternberg’s stylish filming and Greg Cannom’s lo-fi makeup effects enhance the film beyond its meager budget. Billy Jacoby can get a bit whiny as the nerd, but he’s likable and has a great character arc. Stuart Fratkin is funny as Wesley’s opportunistic friend, who comes off a bit pervy, but the movie calls him out. On top of looking gorgeous, Judy Landers is fun to watch with her doe-eyed expression and soft voice. Raymond O’Connor is delightfully creepy, Olivia Barash is cute, and the rest of the cast all do a fine job. Also, cult film fans should watch for appearances from Linnea Quigley, Troy Donahue, Ginger Lynn, Michelle Bauer, and Edy Williams. At 90 minutes, the movie gets in and out fairly quickly and keeps the action going with plenty of shenanigans. Overall, Dr. Alien is stupid, but it’s an enjoyable kind of stupid.

     

    Buy Dr. Alien from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3LmBQh4.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong (2011)

    Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong (2011)

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    Like the original, Evil Bong 2: King Bong was a hit for Full Moon Features, so a sequel was inevitable. After the release of Avatar in 2009, there was a resurgence in 3D, and Charles Band wanted in on it. Band hadn’t made a 3D movie since Parasite 3D and Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn, so this was exciting. Unfortunately, he lacked those movies’ budgets, but luckily, cinematographer Thomas L. Calloway, aka Terrance Ryker, had a solution. Calloway had previously worked on the 3D film Long Day Journey, so that they could rent the equipment from that production. Full Moon held a writing contest, with the winner being video game reviewer Patrick Klepek. He sent them a complete outline, which they turned into the script, though he was given a writing credit. Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong had a small theatrical run in 2011, complete with scratch-and-sniff cards.

    [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_circle_counter title=”Rating” number=”55″ bar_bg_color=”#EDF000″ _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][/et_pb_circle_counter][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″]

    Synopsis

    Stoners Brett (Brian Lloyd) and Bachman (Mitch Eakins) are running their weed shop when a weird guy (Irwin Keyes) arrives. He found a strange alien bong near a crashed meteor and wants to sell it to them. They take it but notice an abnormal growth on his body and that the Alien Bong (Circus-Szalewski) can speak. The guys get Larnell (John Patrick Jordan) and Allistair (Peter Stickles) to help, but that’s not enough. Larnell calls Gramps (Jacob Witkin), now a weed doctor working with Nurse Hookah (Christina DeRosa), to try and help. He brings the Evil Bong Eebee (Michelle Mais) to try communicating with the Alien Bong, but even she’s perplexed. Soon, the guys are sent to the Alien Bong’s homeworld, where some foxy aliens try sucking their essence dry. Will our heroes stop this alien invasion, or will the Alien Bong be able to take over the world?

     

    Review

    If you’ve seen the first movies, you’ve more or less seen Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong. I’m not exaggerating when I say this is like the last one, but swap the jungle for outer space. While much of the cast is the same, Alistair is recast again, changing Brett Chukerman for Peter Stickles. Compared to Chukerman, Stickles plays the part more like a stereotypical nerd like David Weidoff in the original. Unfortunately, he’s not given much to do here, which might explain why he didn’t return for the later sequels. The rest of the cast plays their parts like before, with Jacob Witkin again being the highlight. Robin Sydney has a few scenes, but she’s another standout as the snobby and airheaded Luann. Also, Sonny Carl Davis looks like he’s having a good time, especially in the alien world.

    Michelle Mais is as crass and loud as Eebee, and Circus-Szalewski makes for a great contrast as the Alien Bong. He gives an appropriately stern and intellectual tone, which reminded me of Jeffrey Combs’ performance in Re-Animator. The late great Irwin Keyes is memorable in his small role, and it’s a shame he disappears after twenty minutes. You can tell these movies are getting cheaper when you look at the sets, just some tiny rooms. The alien world is just a black room with a few props and topless women with body paint. The Alien Bong prop has a unique look with its large horns and pupilless green eyes. Several spots drag at slightly under ninety minutes, and I can’t imagine 3D making this better. Overall, Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong has its moments, but the same tired material is repeated.

     

    Buy Evil Bong 3: The Wrath of Bong from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3L0eVrP.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Decampitated (1998)

    Decampitated (1998)

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    After getting a book about legendary special effects artist Dick Smith, budding filmmaker Matt Cunningham’s path was set. In his own words, the book “set his hair on fire” as he started working on creating homemade make-up. By this time, it was the early 90s, and horror was expanding a mini-boom as self-aware slashers became popular. In 1995, Cunningham and his friends Ryan Lowery, Carolyn C. Miller, and Brian Walters started working on their slasher parody. Filming occurred in Colorado Springs on a minimal budget with a cast primarily of no-name actors. Unfortunately, they didn’t have enough money to market the film, and that’s when Troma stepped in. Lloyd Kaufman helped get the movie in front of audiences by taking it to the 1998 Cannes Film Festival. A few months later, Matt Cunningham’s Decampitated hit video store shelves in November 1998.

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    Synopsis

    Garret (Mike Hart) and April (Christine Patterson) are organizing a camping trip with their friends to DeCamp Acres. There’s Candace (Amy Gordon), Toby (Steve Ladden), Paige (Bethany La Voo), Roger (Thomas Martwick), and Vince (Deus Xavier Scott). Unfortunately, they get into a car accident on their way there and have to hike the rest of the way. Once they get to the campsite, things don’t get much better as there’s a killer on the loose. Throats are sliced, arms are hacked off, ears get cut off, and people get stabbed with tree taps. Also, the group runs into an old friend of Garrret’s, Jake (Ryan Lowery), who’s become a transvestite. As the group scatters across the woods, the mysterious backwoods killer stalks them, waiting for his moment to strike. Who is this mysterious slasher, and who will survive this camping trip from hell?

     

    Review

    Decampitated is one of those movies you’ll love or hate depending on your sense of humor. There’s no hope if a camper trying to escape a killer by hacking her limbs off doesn’t make you giggle. The film is littered with these gags, like a woman beating up the killer with her severed arm. Almost every scene of this movie has some joke or funny moment that comes one after the other. Admittedly, plenty of them miss their mark and often get repeated too much, but there are some real hitters. With a few exceptions, almost everyone plays their parts as silly as possible without mugging for the camera. One of the few exceptions is Amy Gordon, who acts annoyed around these people and always makes passive-aggressive comments. That said, she does have some of the film’s best lines, especially when dealing with Garrett.

    It doesn’t look half bad for a film that most likely only had a few thousand dollars in the budget. There are some decent gore effects, and Cunningham keeps the action moving with some fluid camera movements. Unfortunately, this movie is a product of its time, so get used to tight zooms and choppy editing. The soundtrack has a few nu-metal bands, including H2O, Strife, Coalesce, and Hatebreed, as well as some kitschy 40’s music. The vintage music is mainly used when the killer’s about to strike, which adds to the cartoony vibe. That’s probably the best way to describe this film: a live-action cartoon with gore and some poorly aged stereotypes. At slightly over 90 minutes, this movie is a good time waster you and your friends can enjoy laughing at. Overall, Decampitated is rough around the edges, but it makes for a decent bad movie night.

     

    Buy Decampitated from Amazon: https://amzn.to/4iPOG6Q.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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    Where to watch Decampitated (1998)

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  • Galactic Gigolo (1987)

    Galactic Gigolo (1987)

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    Released in 1987, Psychos in Love was a minor hit for Charles Band’s Wizard Video. After this, Band offered director Gorman Bechard a multi-picture deal to produce more direct-to-video titles for Empire Pictures. With his previous film, Bechard had complete creative control since Band was merely distributing the movie. However, Bechard would grow to hate his time working with Empire Pictures, starting with a sci-fi sex comedy. Originally titled Club Earth, Bechard intended the film to be a “non-animated adult cartoon” with bright, flashy colors. In an interview with Cinefantastique, Bechard said Empire chopped the movie in editing and removed all the colors. To this day, Gorman Bechard has disowned the film and is thankful that Empire Pictures went bankrupt soon after. With all that in mind, let’s look at 1987’s Galactic Gigolo and see how bad it is.

    [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_circle_counter title=”Rating” number=”40″ bar_bg_color=”#E09900″ _builder_version=”4.20.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][/et_pb_circle_counter][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.20.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]

    Synopsis

    After winning a game show, the intergalactic alien Eoj (Carmine Capobianco) wins a trip to Earth. Specifically, he’s sent to Prospect, CT, “The Horniest Town in the Galaxy,” to sleep with as many women as possible. His arrival catches the attention of two groups of people, a family of Jewish rednecks and some mobsters. Billy Joe Bob (Barry Finkel), Big Peter Dick (Todd Kimsey), and Sammy Harry Bill (J.E.L. Gitter) want him captured. Meanwhile, Sonny (Michael Citriniti), Carmine (Tony Kruk), and Tony (David Coughlin) want Eoj to help them commit robberies. Tagging along with Eoj on his sexcapades are reporter Hildy (Debi Thibeault) and her photographer Waldo (Frank Stewart). During one of his more prominent sexcapades with Dr. Pepper (Ruth Collins), Eoj is intercepted by the rednecks and mobsters. Will Eoj escape them and finish his vacation, or is this Galactic Gigolo done for?

     

    Review

    Despite its flaws, I found Psychos in Love a fun, strangely heartfelt horror-comedy romance with a home-grown feel. Because of that, it hurts to say that Galactic Gigolo is one of the most unfunny comedies I’ve ever seen. Granted, I don’t go into a movie like Galactic Gigolo expecting something similar to The Marx Brothers or Mel Brooks. The humor is pretty low-brow, relying either on stereotypes, innuendos, or slapstick, complete with cartoon sound effects. It doesn’t help that the film doesn’t have much of a narrative, just going from one scene to another. It goes like this: sex scene, rednecks acting goofy, sex scene, mobsters doing whatever, rinse and repeat. Even at 80 minutes, the movie feels like it’s slowly plodding along, trying to get to the ending. Honestly, this movie was a slog for me, so be warned if you’re curious to watch it.

    Everyone in the cast plays their parts as exaggeratedly as possible, which can get irritating after a while. The worst is with the rednecks, who stretch their lines so long that you’ll scream, “Cut!” Like Bechard’s last movie, Carmine Capobianco and Debi Thibeault are easily the movie’s highlights and get the biggest laughs. They have a few scenes together where you can see the same chemistry they had in Psychos. Speaking in Bechard’s defense, I can see how he intended this to be like a live-action cartoon. I’m unsure how much Charles Band did to this movie, but I’d be curious to see Bechard’s original vision. Regardless, as unfunny as this movie is, I’d still watch this over It’s Pat or Freddy Got Fingered. Overall, Galactic Gigolo isn’t the worst comedy, but I still wouldn’t give it a glowing recommendation.

     

    Buy Galactic Gigolo on Amazon: https://amzn.to/40m5BUw.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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  • Hectic Knife (2016)

    Hectic Knife (2016)

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    Born in 1986 in Detroit, Greg DeLiso moved to New York to attend the NYFA’s one-year directing program in 2004. After graduation, DeLiso got his first job shooting a music video for PBK’s song “Tout Va Bien.” Around 2010, he and his high school friend Peter Litvin worked on a series called Short Films for Nobody. In 2011, DeLiso directed his first feature-length film, the documentary Canada’s Best Kept Secret, which Litvin did the score for. Around this time, the two started brainstorming ideas for a parody of the recent dark, brooding superhero movie trend. Filming began in 2010 and took roughly four to five years to complete as they had a minimal budget. Once filming finished, they called Troma to make a deal for distribution, and a contract was drafted in a week. Greg DeLiso’s Hectic Knife was released to the world in July 2016.

    [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_circle_counter title=”Rating” number=”70″ bar_bg_color=”#EDF000″ _builder_version=”4.20.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][/et_pb_circle_counter][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.20.2″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]

    Synopsis

    The city streets are riddled with crime, and the only one standing up is the vigilante Hectic Knife (Peter Litvin). Armed with knives, Hectic kills drug dealers and thieves while practicing his knife-wielding skills in his shabby apartment. He gets a roommate, Link (John Munnelly), and a girlfriend, Frannie Glooper (Georgia Kate Haege), who constantly annoys him. Meanwhile, the evil villain, Piggly Doctor (J.J. Brine), plans to rule the world with his sidekick Porch (Traci Ann Wolfe). Piggly’s ultimate plan is to make the heads of children spontaneously explode, and only Hectic Knife can stop him. Along the way, he’ll contend with bagel-obsessed thugs, reunite with his estranged father (Randy Hutch), and find his true self. Unbeknownst to him, his girlfriend has been stealing his money, and Link gets kidnapped by Piggly. It’s up to Hectic Knife to defeat Piggly Doctor and save children from having their heads explode.

     

    Review

    If how I described Hectic Knife makes it sound like one of the dumbest movies ever, that’s because it is. The movie is intentionally bad, but not in a way that feels like they didn’t try, like with Llamageddon. It feels like Greg DeLiso and Peter Litvin set out to make the stupidest film they could come up with. Hectic Knife is constantly brooding and insults everyone he encounters, even his girlfriend, to the point that it becomes funny. Much of the humor is predictable, and some of the jokes drag in a way similar to Adult Swim. As a parody, it does an excellent job satirizing the tropes of many superhero movies around the mid-2000s to 2010s. While a product of its low budget, the black-and-white look could be a parody of Sin City and The Spirit. That said, the cheap aesthetic adds to the film’s campy charm.

    The acting is all over the place, with almost everyone overacting for the camera, showing that this is a comedy. I wouldn’t call the acting bad, as everyone intentionally acts terribly, but your enjoyment will vary depending on your tolerance. While lacking in nudity, there’s plenty of blood and gore to satiate exploitation fans as everyone spews blood all over. The effects aren’t the greatest, but there’s the ambition behind them, especially when they add stop-motion and computer effects. Like the acting, the action sequences are intentionally bad, but it adds to the film’s humor. At slightly under 90 minutes, the film drags considerably at points, and plenty of scenes could’ve been cut. Still, this is a fairly impressive, occasionally funny parody of overly broody and self-serious superhero movies. Overall, Hectic Knife isn’t for anyone, but if thugs arguing over bagels for near eternity sounds funny, check it out.

     

    Buy Hectic Knife from Amazon: https://amzn.to/42y2UAs.

    Disclosure: The above link is an affiliate link, which means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

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    Where to watch Hectic Knife (2016)

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